The Video Autobiography Of Massie Block
by everytimeyoulookatme
Summary: This is my life in the words of me, Massie Block. And Claire Lyons. And a surprise guest."I am Massie Jillian Block, born in the midst of winter under the white blanket of snow that fell right before Christmas Eve-" "I thought you were born in July."


_**I hope you guys like this one-shot (even though I think it's terrible). It's Massie's video autobiography with commentary by Claire Lyons and a surprise guest. It's supposed to be live and shared with the whole school. Claire's commentary will be in italics and the surprise guest's is going to be in bold. Massie's is going to be regular text. And yes, I got this idea from ****HP(dot)que(dot)nette**__** and yes, I did ask her if I can use her idea. So here's my lame attempt at a humor fic. :P**_

_**Disclaimer: Belongs to Lisi and **_**_HP(dot)que(dot)nette_**

Okay. Hello everyone. This is Massie Block, in case you didn't know that already and if you didn't you must be living under a rock. I am making this video to let you all in on my amazing and drama-filled life.

_And I'm Claire Lyons. Massie's best friend. And let me tell you to be her best friend it took a lot-_

Claire shush. You'll get your turn. So as I was saying, I am Massie Jillian Block, born in the midst of winter under the white blanket of snow that fell right before Christmas Eve-

_I thought you were born in July._

Minor details. I was the epitome of the perfect baby. I never cried-

_Except for that one time when you accidentally fell out of the shopping cart in the furniture department of Macy's and you-_

Kuh-laire, where in the world did you hear that from? I would be never be caught dead in a department store. That's disgusting.

_Well my mom was talking to your mom one time and they were telling all these funny stories about you and Todd recorded it. And, well, you remember don't you? He made you kiss-_

That was a rhetorical question.

_Oops. Sorry. _

Moving awn. As a toddler, I was the one everyone fawned over and cooed over. With my amber eyes and brunette curls, I was ready to take pre-school by storm dressed in Little Marc. I had tons of admirers-

_I thought you got kicked out of your first pre-school for being too bossy._

Again with the minor details. I was building my empire and by seventh grade I ruled the school.

_Ooooh. This is the interesting part. It's when I come in the story._

Yes, that's right. Claire Lyons moved next door and joined the PC after minor set-backs. Then in eight grade-

_Hey! There was more to that story you know. You forgot to tell them about your party and how Cam-_

When you make your own video, you can add all the minor details you want. But for now, shush!!

_Hey! I am nawt a minor detail._

Well anyways eight grade was when it all fell apart. It was when Derrick Harrington broke up with me.

_Is he not worthy of the name Derrington anymore?_

Kuh-laire that was not supposed to be a public nickname! So Derrick broke up with my but the worst part was that Dylan, my former best friend, started dating him.

_And everyone knows you don't date a friend's ex._

Finally, you said something right! Well after that I was faced with the betrayal of all my closest friends.

_And they made me choose between them. Naturally, I chose Massie._

Thank you, Claire. So everyone thinks that I'm done, done, and done right?

_Wrong. Watch as Massie comes back on top._

Too true.

**Hey guys. Sorry I'm late. Soccer practice took longer than usual.**

_Hey, Kris. No worries, Massie and I were just getting started._

Hey Kris. You can help with the commentary. So as I was saying, after I was betrayed by Alicia, Dylan, and Kristen-

**But you forgave me right? Right?!?**

_Deep breaths Kris. Deep breaths._

Of course. Just let me continue. I let Claire and Kristen become my new BFF's.

**Whew. And you can have Dempsey. He smells like a Dumpster.**

_But eight grade was not one of our best years. It was when Derrick,_

The immature one.

**Cam**

The sensitive cheater.

_And Josh_

**The hot Spanish one that went crawling back to his girlfriend even after he told me, Kristen Gregory, that no one would come in between our relationship. But nooo he had to dump me in front of-**

_Kristen calm down!_

Well basically they all dumped us. But you don't see us crying over them because we got ourselves some new HARTs.

**Everyone let's welcome the boyfriends of the hawtest girls at BOCD. They're nawt really here. But here are their pictures.**

_Harris Fisher, who unfortunately shares the same last name as my ex, but I don't hold it against him._

Chris Abeley, who is nawt gay by any means.

**And Griffin Hastings, who actually liked The Notebook when I forced him to read it.**

Ping! Eh my gawd. I got an iChat request from Derrington.

_I thought we weren't using that name anymore._

**Who cares? Accept it!!**

But they're D2 us, remember?

_Still…Let's just see what they want. Please?_

Fine. Hello, Derrick. I see you have all your friends with you.

_Massie!! The video camera is still awn. Turn it off before everyone sees it!_

**Hurry!!**

Fine, fine. Derrick wait like 5 minutes. Soo everyone that's the end of my autobiography. Hoped you enjoy and P.S. disregard everything Claire said.

_Hey!_

_**So how did you guys like it? I thought it was terrible. I'm sorry it made like no sense at all and that it was soo random. I'm going to blame it on my headache. But review please even though I put you guy through the torture of my horrible one-shot!!. Review!**_


End file.
